Morning

I’ve started a new ritual in the mornings.

Every morning after feeding the chooks and the horses, the canine crew and I head out for our pre-breakfast walk, usually next door.

We go under and over fences. Heading towards the little forest. I have tracks around and through this space. Sometimes we follow these trails. Sometimes we follow a kangaroo trail through the ferns.

On the other side of this treed area we break out into a clearing and stand in the sunlight. The little hill looks to the south west.

I look into the distance and I ask myself “How are you feeling today?”

Today I reply “I feel okay.”

Tomorrow it may be: “I feel content today” or “I feel happy today” or “it’s a crap day today”.

I want to register my mental state. Make a note of it.

Mt Elephant, extinct volcano, in the distance.

This day when I stop I have two dogs beside me.

They wait and watch, waiting for me to give the signal as to which direction we’re going to move in. The others are sniffing at a rabbit burrow.

In the distance, down the hill, I can see my cows quietly grazing in the lush grass.

To my left, I see a couple of wood ducks sitting on the hill. Beautiful colors of the male. He with his mate. He calls out having seen us there.

Over the boundary fence are a mob of young cattle. They have seen the dogs and decided they must move away from us. They charge off in the opposite direction. A gang of black.

I realize almost instantly that it’s a combination of being surrounded by nature and animals and the brilliant fresh air that I appreciate so much.

The quiet. The stillness. It makes me feel happy. It is what brings contentment into my world.

I inhale. I breathe. I shut my eyes and breathe it in.

I cannot imagine a life without it now.

I cannot imagine getting up in the morning and being faced with a sea of people. Concrete. Noise. Traffic.

When I lived and worked in the big city I used to catch the train to work each day. Crammed in. Faceless. Friendless. Completely disengaged.

I remember reflecting that we were like a swarm of ants. All leaving the nest, heading off together in a line, heading off in a mad rush to work. Nameless. Smileless. Bored. Unhappy. An army of people all doing different things but still the same.

Now here I am standing alone on a hill. I am looking out at an extinct volcano in that direction. A mountain range over there. The blue sky above. Magpies and cockatoos in the trees. I feel the sun on my back.

The dogs are still behind me, waiting.

I am grateful for it all.

And today I am okay.